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Oriental Palace, 38 Mount Ephraim, Tunbridge Wells, TN4 8AU

Oriental Palace, 38 Mount Ephraim, Tunbridge Wells, TN4 8AU

38 Mount Ephraim, Tunbridge Wells, TN4 8AU

If you were to give me a choice I would not go to a Chinese Restaurant. I’m not entirely sure if it was my first experience, going to my “girlfriend” Barbara Muir’s birthday party as a ten year old at the Hong Kong in Dundee or not. I was a dead cert for the Chicken Maryland, but Barbara’s dad Jim insisted I try the sweet and sour pork. Sour? Where was the bloody sour? It was sweet, sweet, sweet, sticky, gooey, violent infra-red gloop surrounding a bit of pig. It was so horrible I didn’t eat anything remotely Chinese until I was in my twenties. Even then it was a backdoor through. I fell in love with Korean food – bitter Kim Chee and barbecued Bul Gogi - a heavenly combination with noodles and sticky rice. Korean through to Thai, Indonesian, subtle Vietnamese and finally to fiery Szechuan and ceremoniously dumped on the door of Cantonese.

Café Pacifico,5-6 Langley Street, London, WC2H 9JA

Café Pacifico,5-6 Langley Street, London, WC2H 9JA

5-6 Langley Street, London, WC2H 9JA

I've been here twice and have not been impressed. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't completely unhappy about the whole thing, but I don't think this place is the best Mexican you can get in London, a claim that's made by a lot of reviewers.

The rice is soggy, and the dishes are bland and flavourless, definitely not what we have come to expect from Mexican food.

The staff aren't that friendly, and it is expensive, for what it is. You can definitely do better than this, I just haven't found it yet.

Riddle & Finns Champagne & Oyster Bar, 129 Church Road, Hove BN3 2AE

Riddle & Finns Champagne & Oyster Bar, 129 Church Road, Hove BN3 2AE

129 Church Road, Hove BN3 2AE

I’ve reviewed Riddle & Finns Brighton establishment before but they’ve recently opened a branch in Hove so I popped in. I’ll keep this review short since the general feel is similar to their Brighton place, but smaller.

We sat down and ordered a drink. ‘Does your Guinness come in bottles?,’ I asked the waitress. ‘Yes, I’m afraid so,’ she replied. Well, since I like bottle Guinness and not draught, this was good. It arrived already in a glass. ‘Did this come out of a bottle?,’ I asked the (different) waitress. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Then why has it got an inch and a half of head on it?’ I wanted to know. ‘We pour it so well,’ she said. I frowned. ‘Oh, and there’s a widget in the bottle.’ I smelt a rat and took a sip. It was out of a can or I’m a Dutchman. I returned it and ordered a Budvar, which – interestingly – arrived at the table in its bottle, just like all the other beer I saw that night. If it’s in a can, chaps, why not admit it, or better actually get a few bottles in. Some of us know the difference.

Wimpy, 105 Blatchington Road, Hove BN3 3YG

Wimpy, 105 Blatchington Road, Hove BN3 3YG

105 Blatchington Road, Hove BN3 3YG

Ok so I went to Wimpy – so what?!

Wimpy is little changed from the places I remember from my 70s youth. Lots of plastic, strange food and a feeling that the driftwood of life washes up here.

There was me, Mart, and T. We had had a couple of beers and fancied a face full of something before a few more beers. Wimpy was closer than the curry house and it seemed like a novel idea.

We found a seat without trouble – there being only two other people in the place: both staff.

The Spring Hill, 312a Spring Hill, Warstones Rd, Penn, Wolverhampton, West Midlands, WV4 4LB


312a Spring Hill, Warstones Rd, Penn, Wolverhampton, West Midlands, WV4 4LB

The food was simply delicious, the best meal out I've had in months. I had the grilled sea bass, with sauteed potatoes, which tasted fantastic, and the creamed leeks/creamed spring onions (I couldn't work out which) set it off perfectly. If you like seafood - visiting here is a must. There must have been 10 fresh fish dishes on the menu, ranging from sea bass, to barramundi, and crab. Non-fish included the usual steak fare, coq-au-vin, a number of vegetarian options. The place is very well decorated with a very rustic feel.

Le Vivier, 6 rue Dominic Maisto, 13200 Arles, Provence, France

Le Vivier, 6 rue Dominic Maisto, 13200 Arles, Provence, France

6 rue Dominic Maisto, 13200 Arles, Provence, France

This was near our hotel and looked really promising. The interior was quite shabby, the seats on the chairs had “gone” (not literally) and it had not been redecorated for some time, but this need not be a bad sign in a French restaurant. The food is the thing and the menu looked excellent. We went for the €25 menu: my soupe de poissons had been diluted once too often and was very watery, but came with the traditional croutons, aoli, grated cheese and garlic. L started with foi gras with lavender bread and lavender ice cream, and while it sounds a bit unlikely, it was actually the star of the meal. When did you last have ice cream and foi gras on the same plate? My main course of fish gratinée was nice enough, but it was a tiny portion, and no bread or vegetables accompanied it. L had a variety of grilled fish, well presented, but some were overcooked. My dessert - chocolat crème – tasted OK, but the presentation was complicated and didn’t really come off as the pudd slid dangerously around the plate on its way to the table, dislodging some of the fruit garnish. Of L’s plate of four cheeses, two were very salty, and he had to ask for bread as no biscuits or bread came with it.

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